Basic evolution requires for the mating of people to procreate. The feelings that arise as a result of oxytocin can be necessary for the continuation of homo sapiens. Other factors as well are needed for the procreation of humans. In this case, I will be talking about love. Typically, the feeling of love results because of this oxytocin hormone. But, what does this love feeling really feel like to the average human?
In my opinion, love can be felt towards pretty much anyone that you set your mind to loving. I feel that people have control over who they choose to love. The feeling of love itself is unexplainable really. It is a feeling that you’ll never forget. It is so powerful.
Love does not always come equally, meaning, you will not love everyone equally. There are levels when it comes to love. For example, you may feel more comfortable doing certain activities with your significant other instead of your friend. That increases the level of love you feel towards your partner. Also, a counter to that is maybe you have certain activities that you only do with your friend and not your significant other. That increases the level of love you feel towards your friend. I believe that, on some level, it is healthy to feel more comfortable in your relationship with your partner than with your friend. This is because, if you may be living with your partner, you’re essentially baring yourself in many ways and therefore should be more comfortable. If not, then there may be a conflict in your relationship.
Sometimes, there is love that you have towards a person that you can never fully get the taste of due to restrictions. These restrictions can range anywhere from mental inhibitions to physical restrictions. What I mean when I say mental inhibitions is that you constantly look for reasons not to be with the person you love. One way this connects to the physical restrictions is that you will find a reason not to be with the person you love to fulfill the needs of other people not wanting you to be with that person.
Love may just come from the feeling of oxytocin like I mentioned before, but, the excruciating pain you feel when you can’t be with the person you love feels like physical pain. This pain grows as the time apart from your loved one grows. Imagine not being allowed to see and spend time with the person you love due to people around, who say they “love” you and “want” the best for you, telling you not to. It may feel like a wound, getting deeper and more infected as it pierces through your heart.
If any of you have felt this type of pain, you’ll understand. These mental inhibitions and physical restrictions just seem so out of your control. You just want control over yourself. You also want to control your decision of whom you get to love and whom you want to spend your time with forever.
Maybe you have spent one time with that person you love so much and it changed your life forever, in a positive way of course. You feel like, even though they may have some imperfections, you can brush those off because you love them so much. In other words, your mental inhibitions are erased by all the love you feel towards them. He/she makes you feel alive. They are your teacher, your best friend, your lover, your therapist, and, your guider. You want to wonder with them and get lost with them. You know you can always and forever count on them to be there for you. This all sounds super cheesy but it feels super true.
A love that can’t be reached is terrible. People should never take for granted the person they love and that they can be with. They should be grateful for their loved one every single day. Some people just can’t be with the person they love so much because they have not gained the courage to get rid of their mental inhibitions and physical restrictions.
Some people may say that the feeling of love is just oxytocin and nothing more. Those are the people who haven’t fell in love yet. It’s wrong to just label it oxytocin and not describe it more. Love is a feeling that lights you on fire. It never makes you feel full. You always find yourself wanting and needing more. People who have a love that they can’t reach, they feel a deep pain and a deep sadness because they want and need more of the love they feel but have no means of getting it due to the mental and physical restrictions as well as distance set upon them.
When it comes to the person you love, if you logically and intuitively know you love them, there has to be a point in your life where you start taking control of yourself as you throw your mental inhibitions and physical restrictions out the window. Once you do that, you grow as an individual because you start gaining control of yourself. You stop letting other people dictate how you should be living. That is the best prize of growth.
People might say oxytocin is just a “love hormone” and nothing more, but it truly is so much more than that. You’ll understand once you’ve felt it yourself. The feeling itself is absolutely indescribable and something you desperately need to reach for. It feels so agonizing when you can’t seem to reach it. It’s terrible, sincerely terrible.